One of the goals I want to achieve in my time off is to explore my creative side more. Creativity has always been a huge aspect of my personality, but I have never really been able to find or stick to one or two things that really allow me to express myself. I always start out with the best intentions, but then life gets in the way and they find their way into the abyss of the cupboard never to be completed.

I always loved art as a kid, and still do, I just don’t feel I have any actual talent. However, one of the things I would like to explore is drawing. It has always been a skill that I have wanted to have, but there were always others with natural talent around me so I never pursued it. I think I could learn though and feel it would be a great expression. I have always loved cartoons, digital/vector art, anime and comics, so this is where I would lean to. Not so much realism. George also bought me the Harry Potter and Star Wars adult colouring books (and pencils) for Christmas, so I think this will be a good start to ease my way in.

I also loved sewing in high school home economics and have always thought about picking it up again. Then I discovered cosplay and it all seems to make sense. However, the costume I wanted to make for Comic Con this year was never finished due to being an adult taking up too much time. I do really want to finish it though and make many costumes/clothes for myself out of awesome fabrics. I think I just need to dedicate some time to it.

Which kind of leads me into fashion I guess. For the last 3 years since I really discovered who I am and have had some form of body positivity I have been much more creative in the way that I dress. Probably because now I actually have disposable income to spend on things like clothes and the fact I have embraced that I am different and that’s ok. Fashion is all about being yourself. I find it funny that people think I go to effort, because one of my main choices fashion wise is to be comfortable and for me to not go to too much effort in the morning because screw that. So I have collected a large amount of t-shirts, leggings, skirts and skater dresses because these are what I think suit my body type, they are easy and I feel good in them. What I have noticed though, is that I don’t really dress like anyone else. So I guess fashion is a bit of a creative outlet for me, but I’m still not sold on it because it seems all too easy.

There has also been a bunch of crafty type projects over the years like knitting tiny animals, except I didn’t really fully understand how much effort that was and waaaay overestimated my knitting ability, so that kind of was put on hold indefinitely. Speaking of craft, I have started doing Friday crafternoons with a friend at work in which for 15 mins we gather up our craft supplies purchased from a local $2 shop and just make something no matter what. It really is quite fun and a great stress relief and even though our efforts might be small, we are pretty proud of ourselves in the end with what we make.

My job whilst inherently creative as it is in Advertising can be a great outlet for my creativity too. However, not directly. I am not technically a “creative” in advertising, I am one of those people that makes shit happen, formulates strategies and is more technical and functional. I do though have this ability to know what the client will want or what I think will work best, so with my gift of subtle manipulation I can plant seeds within the minds of those whose actual job it is to be creative and usually my seed blossoms into a beautiful flower. I do get great satisfaction in this as whilst I might not be the best artist or writer, I’m the secret idea guy, an idea ninja if you will who stealthily swoops in and out with no one being any wiser. I don’t need the adulation of it being my idea, I am just happy to be a part of the creative process and see my idea flourish.

This is going to sound really strange, but I have always loved flower arranging. There is just something about it. I have often thought about being a florist at some point in my life, maybe when I am semi retired I will do that.I don’t get much opportunity to arrange flowers now like I did when I was a kid because our garden is currently barren and George is allergic to pollen. But this has always been something I was interested in and quite good at too.

So I guess I have worked out what I am going to do to try to release my creative side more. I am going to start drawing and making sure I stick to it. Then I might branch out into to sewing and cosplay once I have more control over other aspects of my life. I am going to dedicate some of my downtime to both of these. It is important to express myself creatively. I feel like that is one of the main reasons for the rut I am in now. I just haven’t had any time between work and all my other duties to let my creative juices go.

I’ll return to this topic in a few months to see if I have pulled my finger out at all.